I dont know about other people especially woman in their ’40s but my mom has showing me lots of action that indicate her ‘dead insideness’ (?)
Like, everytime I said something about gossips and news, I got hyped and all excited, then she replied with such uninterested yet unpleasing respons, such as “How useless your internet data wasted from getting such stuff, what did you get from that gossips?” And I was like, “Okay, you’re right.” While awkwardly re-thinking what have I done entirely, and made me felt like I need to re-evaluate my live.
Again, she really dislike me, everytime I read novel book, she said something like, “Its useless, you dont get anything and thats waste of time.” Okay… Take a deep breath, I assume she never read a damn novel book, not a single one. So maybe she think ‘Why read something that doesnt exist when you can read encyclopedia or any other text book.’
Thats happen multiple time, its even worse when she’s under pressure or stress, why people in their fourty are so ‘serious’, they dont know the meaning behind ‘useless stuff’ that teenagers do are actually means alot. Useless things are my happiness, when she asked me what I got, I answerd ‘happiness’.
Then be frankly, I asked her back,“And Mom, what did you got for being so tensed up all the time? Stress, right?”
“This stress provide you a nice life for almost 20 years, tyke.”
I Gave up.